Li moo neex. This is what's good. Its midday (3), and despite prior thoughts because I was sweating inside a tin roof, its not that hot today. (I say that as beads of perspiration form on my face -though I am drinking a steaming mess cup of cafe saaf.) My armpits already wafting up a good odor, though minutes ago they were glistening, freshly de-haired and pale white in the sun, with drying bucket bath drops.
A cool shower in the hot sun -dreaded hair dripping over my orange bucket -I am now skilled at all sorts of bending.
And door closed-I can wear my loose cotton Lake Winnapesaukee dress, no silipu, my wet hair, already hot, tied up in my towel.
I have decided that an empty stomach is better than a full one because you have the scales to tip, but once you fill it up you put all your hopes to the other side to empty it back out again peacefully. Mooy, 'diges ak jamm,' rekk.
There is a time when your body shuts off/up -and then your thoughts are clear. You are free to act as pure spirit. Oh to transcend this line toujours. But then I would no longer be Fatou/Jaime, Walker on both sides of the world.
Also, today I did a CCBI lesson, a simple, but great one -and all I did was follow (what God said) (what I thought) (what my instinct told me) (what was right) (what was natural). Mooy, I let the faculty of faith take over. I am tired of the faculty of reason.
The faculty of reason leads you round and round again in endless interlinking circles, and if you try to pursue it to some goal or some end you will end up frustrated, lost, or wasting your time. Of course, submit yourself to the faculty of reason at some point in your life, (maybe earlier) to know its crevices, to know its reaches. But know it is so limited, and eventually you will know when and how to let it go. Faculty of faith pulls endlessly from the uncreated, the unknown. It writes, just let it do so. Relinquish that you can know your spot in the interlinking circles. You are an electron. Unknowable.
And thus I have the faith to go back home and live my life.
No comments:
Post a Comment